I have never been ashamed of my sexuality

Dear Dr Leigh.

I am twenty years old, I am female, I have lived in Canberra since I was eight and without question consider this my home. When I turned eighteen I was more excited about the prospect of voting, of having my voice heard, than I was about being able to go clubbing in Civic.

 I am political and compassionate. I am optimistic and argumentative and educated. I was raised by wonderful, intelligent, open-minded, progressive parents who told me that I could achieve anything and as such have never let anyone attempt to dissuade me from reaching my goals. I smile at strangers, I believe whole-heartedly that I can and will make a difference in my lifetime.

I am also a queer.

I have never been ashamed of my sexuality, but it is not the sole component of my identity. It is difficult for me to understand how despite everything that I could be defined by, the label of queer is the one that seems to become the most important. Even more frustrating is that it is generally used in the context of telling me that I am not able to do something as simple as have my love for a partner of the same sex recognised as equal to that of the relationships of my heterosexual peers. 

Dr Leigh, I implore you to consider for a moment how you would feel if the Australian government told you that your love for your wife was invalid, that the fact that you are a heterosexual man was the be-all-and-end-all of who you are, that no matter what else you say or do, everything hinged on one tiny facet of your identity. It’s complicated, and confusing, and upsetting, and this is how so many members of your electorate feel every day. 

Yes, I am queer, but it is not all that I am, or all that I will ever be. The gender of those I choose to date, to have sex with, to fall in love with, does not define me, nor does this constitute a valid reason for discrimination against me. 

I’m only twenty years old, and I feel I have so much life to live. I am not going to stop voting or caring about human rights. I am probably not going to stop arguing for the sake of debate or yelling at rallies or figuratively sticking my middle finger up at anyone who ever tries to tell me that I can’t do something because I’m a girl. I will never stop smiling at strangers or singing obnoxiously loudly in my car. I will not stop loving and caring and feeling. I will never stop being queer.  I hope that in my lifetime, the Australian government stops treating my sexuality as the only thing that I am, and recognises my right to express my love for whom ever I choose. 

My peers and I are going to change the world, Dr Leigh. It is up to people like you to help us. 

Emily Bissaker.